I just finished listening to the podcast and joined your FB group a few days ago. I just cannot believe that man (if he can even be called a man at this point) had the energy to continuously screw people over. Thank God for the new law, but it makes me wonder how many others in other states are abusing the courts!

So anyway, I do have a story, but it isn’t nearly as crazy and there was no financial abuse or court involved. It was more of a simple lesson in how to look out for liars in the future and I’m actually grateful that it happened when I was young. It made it a lot easier to weed through big red flags later on.

The number one red flag: “She’s crazy.”

Here’s my story…

It’s 2008, and I’m 23 years old—it was my first year as a teacher. In April, I landed a second job waitressing so I could work more and save money over the summer.

Well, at some point I ended up hooking up with my manager, Chris. I remember seeing his girlfriend in the restaurant a few times before, but being young and naïve, I assumed that if he was hooking up with me that they had broken up. I assumed wrong.

By the time fall came, me and Chris were hanging out all the time. Now this is where I noticed red flag #1 – he would NEVER spend the night. He would only stay until 3 or 4am and then leave. There was always a good excuse. I finally just asked him, “did you break up with Teresa?” His response was…OF COURSE they broke up. But the truth was that she had moved across the country to be with him, and they were still living together.

One day, a friend of mine was on Craigslist looking for apartments and she came across a listing. It was posted by Chris and Teresa, and it was very apparent that they were a couple looking for a roommate. I printed out the listing and texted him to meet me in the office at the restaurant. Before, I would say that was aggressive, now I would say it was pitiger! This is where red flag #2 showed up, “she’s crazy, she thinks we’re still a couple.” He made up some nonsense to cover up the fact that she still lived there.

We continued dating and hanging out, and I continued buying his bullshit.

By December of 2008, it all goes down! I was on school break and as a young twenty-something, I was ready to get my party on! It was a Tuesday—normally a slower day at the restaurant—so Chris planned to meet up with me and my friends at another bar down the street once he got off work at ten o’clock. Well, the place ended up getting slammed since everyone else was also ready to get hammered on Christmas Eve. So, I decided to walk my drunk self down the street to see him at work.

What did I see when I arrived? None other than the girlfriend. I knew who she was, but she didn’t know me. I hovered nearby and overhead her refer to her boyfriend multiple times during conversation. That was it! I ended up confronting Teresa right then and there. I said, “did you just call Chris your boyfriend?” and she said something like “yeah do you have a problem with that?” So, I spilled, and I told her I had been hooking up with him for a few months. She said, “my boyfriend can fuck whoever he wants” and then told me she would take me outside and beat my ass. I’m frail and she was a marathon runner, so I had to turn down that lovely offer. Then I decided to walk a mile to my apartment and demanded Chris come talk to me when he was done closing. He did, but that talk was useless. Chris tried getting away with the lie again, but drunk Delilah wouldn’t allow it. Meanwhile, Teresa actually drove my drunk friends home!

She ended up moving back to the west coast and my stupid ass continued dating him.

One day to my surprise, she turned up at the restaurant while I was working. She flew back because they had a trip planned while they were still together. He, of course, assured me it was just an old friend group and I had nothing to worry about. Except, when I stalked Facebook, Teresa had public photos of the trip…and the two of them certainly looked very much like a couple.

After that, he basically got back together with her without telling me, because he’s a giant pussy who can’t handle confrontation. I think at that point I just accepted it and moved on, although I’m sure I still tried flirting with him and getting him to cheat on her because that’s who I was at the time – the worst!

I think the really horrible part about all of this is that Teresa, who I was told was sooooo crazy, gave that asshole about ten years of her life with no ring in sight. She actually ended up being really nice and while we didn’t become best friends, we did become Facebook friends and chatted for a while.

Chris ended up eventually meeting someone and married her within the first year [or maybe shorter]. They’ve been married seven years now. And Teresa, the ex, is also happily married to a great guy. As for me, I said fuck men and have a beautiful girlfriend and get to experience the constant joy of people asking if she’s my roommate or sister!

If you have a story to share, please send us an email at ExWivesUndercover@gmail.com